How to help teens feel good about temselves


It's not easy being a teenager and feeling good about yourself in today's world. Your hormones are going crazy, you've got the pressure to fit in, be popular, the stress to do well at school, to get things together. And on top of all this, you're constantly being bombarded with these images of perfection: the ideal body and skin as shown in magazines, movies and on TV. It's not just perfect skin; everyone seems to have the perfect body too. Being unrealistically thin has become the beauty ideal, from models on the runway to your favourite celebs on the red carpet.

And you are confronted with all of this while your body is constantly changing; the pressure on how you should look is huge. It's no wonder so many teens feel inadequate and negative about their bodies. Most teens are plagued with self-doubt and insecurity from time to time; it's a natural part of growing up. But it becomes a problem when feelings of not being good enough begin to take over and become your main focus. Instead of accepting your uniqueness, you start to reject the very things that make you special. Unfortunately, many of us look to models as the ideal definition of body size and beauty. But in reality, they're naturally far from perfect. These models start out as normal, but through the use of high-tech photography and computers, they become the image of perfection. By using special lighting, angle shots and airbrushing any scars, lines and imperfections are removed without a trace. In fact, most of the pictures you see in ads and magazines today are digitally altered in some way.

Even celebrities get airbrushed. And, on top of that, don't forget that most celebs and models have the best make-up artists, stylists, hairdressers, personal trainers and chefs working for them around the clock. There is so much work going on behind the scenes that we don't get to see. If we all had that much help, believe me, we'd look that way too. For a reality check, watch the ‘Dove Evolution' video, which shows what's really going on behind the scenes. The images of women and men in ads today are intended to sell products. Unfortunately they don't promote a positive or healthy self-image. The media is a powerful force, but remember it's not reality.

Have you ever thought about how these unreal images actually affect you? If you tend to feel worse about yourself after seeing these images, well, you're not alone. Research has shown that young teenage girls who look at pictures of thin, idealised models have higher rates of depression, lower self-esteem, and are more likely to develop seriously unhealthy habits. The desire to be thin causes lots of girls to take up smoking (to curb appetite), cut down on consuming too many kilojoules (calories), abuse laxatives, overuse saunas, over-exercise, and even cut back on drinking water. When you have a negative body image, you generally have a distorted perception of your size and shape, which can lead to feelings of shame and anxiety. Psychologists and counsellors agree that a negative body image can be a direct cause of low self-esteem; the more negative the perception of your body, the more negative you feel about yourself. Being unhappy with your body can affect how you feel about yourself as a person.

It's not uncommon for people who think poorly of their bodies to lose confidence and have problems in other areas of their lives, including their relationships. All you need to do is open the latest issue of a teen or women's magazine and you're likely to be bombarded with this message: keep losing weight because you can never be thin enough. In reality, only about 4 per cent of women genetically have the ideal body currently portrayed in the media. So it's no wonder studies suggest that as many as 90 per cent of girls want to reduce their body size. This thin ideal of beauty is impossible for most people to achieve and it comes at a great risk of hurting your health.

Peer-group influence has a huge impact too. If your friends value thinness and engage in unhealthy diets and ways to lose weight, you're more likely to do the same just to fit in. Resist this trap and never compare yourself to anyone else. You are a unique and perfect you. As Judy Garland, the famous actress from the 1940s and 1950s who starred as Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, said: ‘Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.'

Having a healthy body image means feeling comfortable and at home in your body. It means that you know how to take care of yourself and that you strive to be the best person that you can be in all aspects of your life. Teens with high self-esteem have the ability to handle the stressful stuff that gets thrown their way. And, most importantly, a strong sense of self allows you to accept yourself for who you are - you won't feel the need to change yourself for your friends or anyone else. As Eleanor Roosevelt, author and wife of the thirtysecond president of the United States, famously said, ‘No one can make you feel inferior without your consent'.

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Note: This article was sent to us by: Mark Thompson at 07092010

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