How do you abandon self-consciousness? Isn't it ingrained into every fiber of our media-saturated, dissatisfied being? Well, yes, and shedding it takes time and practice. But this is how you start. Embrace the fact that you are physically and mentally imperfect. Say it out loud. Maybe even write it down. Accept that no matter how hard you work out, you are never going to have a "perfect" body. Say that out loud too: "I am imperfect and I will always be imperfect."
Celebrate the fact that being imperfect does not matter. Say something like, "Woo-hoo! I am free of the pressure of impossible striving for perfection!" or whatever your particular idiom moves you to say. Identify an athletic goal that you want to achieve: ride a bike one hundred miles, hike to the top of the tallest mountain within a thousand miles, spike a volleyball, carve swooping turns on a snowboard. Say, out loud, that you can accomplish this feat even with big thighs or droopage in the upper arms.
If you choose to run a marathon, repeat to yourself, out loud, every night and every morning, "I can and will run a marathon even if my thighs never get any smaller as a result of all my hard training." Go do the things that will enable you to do your athletic thing. If you've always dreamed of playing tennis like Serena Williams, go sign up for classes again. Beginners' classes, if that's where you're at. Hold your head high. Say to yourself, "I look okay, I feel great, and I don't give a crap what anyone else thinks." Practice during this, and eventually it will become second nature, on most days at least.
The tricky thing about some of the early parts of a fitness program is that the critical parts of the approach take place inside the labyrinths of your brain. I'll give you some brain stuff to work on while you move your body. Here are some ways to practice thinking differently about fitness and incorporating that thinking into your movement:
Notice other people doing cool athletic things, especially people who are similar in age, gender, body type, or other distinguishing characteristic. Make a point of appreciating the old geezer on the thirty-year-old steel-frame French road bike, the thick girl in the aerobics class, the final finisher in your local 5k race. Go to events to find these people if you don't see them around your neighborhood, because they are out there, doing their thing. Appreciate those people. They are living the Way of the Imperfect Athlete. See how the thickset women do all the same moves as the thinner ones.
Notice the things your body can do now. Every time you get up off a low couch, you are achieving a small miracle of strength and coordination. Go outside and take a walk around the block or put on the tunes that make you dance like you were sixteen again. While you're moving, notice things that you normally take for granted, like the balance that keeps you from falling down. This is not a "well, duh" but rather a finely tuned, incredibly complex interaction of systems. Notice how your feet, calves, knees, and thighs all work together to keep you moving, and how your arms naturally swing to balance your movement. This is the beauty of function, and this is what you build on to become an athlete.
There's a cliché in fitness writing that tells you to take the stairs instead of the elevator whenever you can. Yes, yes, it's true, though I'd much rather take the elevator. But when I do take the stairs, I make a point of thinking of it as strength training, and appreciating the work that my legs, back, hips, butt, and even abdominal muscles are doing to get me from the ground floor to the first floor. So take the stairs, even one floor, and take them as an athlete.
If you're already doing regular exercise, take time to think about what it really means to lift weights for twenty minutes or ride the equivalent of ten miles on an exercise bike. Go to Google maps and see how far ten miles is from your house. Do some math about the amount of weight you just lifted. Two sets of ten dumbbell curls with ten-pound weights on each arm is . . . um . . . four hundred pounds. That's a lot. And that's just one exercise for your upper arms.
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